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You're on a great date. You're interested. How do you make that second date a reality?
The first time meeting someone is always a little awkward. If you are having a good time on a date, you often assume your date is having a good time as well. So you take the leap and put yourself out there, get a number…then get ghosted...poof…What happened? How do you tell if your date is just being friendly or if they are genuinely interested in getting to know you on a romantic level? Unfortunately, there is no way to gauge if your date is interested in you or not, not even you. So here my advice for everyone.
If you are having a nice time, say so! It can be as simple as, “Mark, I am having a great time, I am glad we had the opportunity to meet”. Or, “Jennifer, you are really easy to talk to, I am having a lot of fun".
If you would like to see this person again, say something like “I had a really nice time, would you like to do something again?”. It's best to set a date then and there or at the very least get their number. Once you have their phone number, thank them for the date within 24 hours. So often, people exchange numbers and never go out again. Sometimes both parties had a good time and would go out again, but the uncertainty of how the other person feels prevents them from reaching out and committing to a second date. We also feel that people expect fireworks or an instant connection so if it was just an okay date, they let it fizzle out. This is a mistake. DO NOT give up a second date with someone because it wasn’t magic. Second dates are key to seeing who someone truly is. Typically during the second date people are more relaxed and more confident, which usually makes them more attractive, and makes the date more enjoyable.
If you are not interested in seeing someone again please do not take a phone number you have no intention of responding to. Just simply say “Thank you for asking, unfortunately this is not a fit for me but I wish you luck in your search” People truly respect the honesty.